Good Evening,
I know that i have not blogged in about 27 days. I feel bad, i have let my followers down. I've been going through so much that last 27 days i cant even begin to explain. I have so much going on in my life, so many things that i have committed to, but i have not committed to myself. At one point along this journey i was so focused and determined that nothing could get me down. I soon let food starts its horrible take over in my life. it all started with my cheating on Sundays. i really feel like it has destroyed this boot camp, its nobody's fault but my own. I really thought it would work out but its not. My goal for this boot camp was to lose 40 pounds and unless i chop off my right leg that is not going to happen in the next two weeks. I cant believe all i have is two weeks left. I have missed twice so far, but that is still one week. I just get tired of waking up and driving over there, half of this process is eating and exercising, the other half is attitude. if you have a bad attitude you will never complete anything in life. I will still be wearing that blazer at Melissa wedding though, so with two weeks left full speed ahead. I recently watched the Steve Harvey movie " Act like a woman, think like a man" it has be asking myself so many questions. If i want to be in a committed relationship with anyone i have got to get myself together. I have to lose this weight. I will in due time. I know what i need to do, i just have to do it. I have got to push, and push it until i get it right. Im ready and willing to do whatever i have to to make things work, and i will. Tired of being alone, tired of being fat...onward and upward here we go again.
Sunday, April 29, 2012
Monday, April 2, 2012
My Mama said I Didn't have to do Burpees
Good Morning Followers,
It has been a great weekend i must say. It was hot and sunny, getting ready for a wonderful and beautiful summer. On saturday we had a free versus saturday mornign workout. There were about 75 people there ready to work out. As steve says they could have been on the couch but they decided you work out instead. I had the pleasure of three important guest, Lucy, Alicia, and my Mother. My mama gave up during the warm up..but alicia and lucy pushed through the whole workout. i was very proud of them. Our workout consisted of the following.
WARM UP
400 METER RUN
HIGH KNEES
JUMPING JACKS
SQUATS
BUTT KICKERS
HIGH KICKS
The work was a Tabata. Tabata is 20 seconds of hard work then 10 seconds of rest for about 4 min. There were 5 stations. Squats, Sucicides, Push-ups, Planks, and Burpees. It was a pretty rough work out but i loved every minute of it. Working out in the sun, and in the grass reminds me of my old football days. As my mother loves to tell the story, she claims i was always picking flowers instead of playing the game. I remember those saturday mornings, the only thing i wanted was the after game snacks. For some reason oranges cut into section in zip lock bags taste amazing, and this is where my love started with HI-C fruit punch with those little orange juice boxes, and who can forget a good rice crispy treat. The was my goal at the end of each game was to make it to the snack line. This workout amazed me. Im sure the fact that my mother was on the sidelines helped, it brought back many memories. For boys you always want to make your mother happy, even if that means doing something you hate doing. You do it because it makes her happy. As i was doing push-ups i could see her in the distance in her pink tshirt and Women of faith Hat..lol. It was a very calming experience, the only thing that changed is i was doing this for myself and not her. The last three months my life has been changed, little by little and I know she is proud of me. She also knows that im the dramatic child, i always have been. My older brother doesnt speak very much, and my little sister is so hood i cant understand anything she nor her friends are saying, So ive always been the talker. Im techinally not a middle child, but i am. I had two older brothers who passed away so that left me the middle child. Ive always tried to use it, and my mama never stands for it lol. I was extremely happy she was there. Lucy you are amazing, im so happy to have you on board with versus get ready to change your life. lucy emailed me about the saturday morning workout. She told me she really wanted to come to test it out. She did and she put forth some great effort and made it all the way through. She now is apart of our 6am boot camp class. Alicia and I have know each other for some time now, and we have battled this thing called weight loss together. she and i were part of WDAM's the biggest loser, i lost, she came in second. So we are very familiar with the stresses that are involved in weight loss and i know that it is not easy. Alicia being the amazing woman she is gets out of her car FULL MAKE UP. no kidding. I started laughing thinking to my self, well all thats about to be in the grass. I could tell she was nervous. I was happy she was there. She made it through all the workouts but the burpees. At the end she told me, ' i could either sit there and pass out or throw up, and i dont want to throw up in front of all these people." But she pushed through. Burpees suck man, they suck so bad. Burpees give you the same feeling like when you are on the toilet taking a dump and there is no toilet paper on the roll, so you reach underneath the cabinet and there is none, thats the feeling burpees give you. I hate burpees. As we crawled to the burpee station, i told the coach my mama said i didnt have to do burpees. She just laughed and said Lets go, its burpee time, like some annoying cheerleader. I made it through, i was soaked in sweat, dirt, grass, and im sure some ants had a heart attack. It was probably one of the best workouts ever. Nicole and Krista were there too. I need krista to start working out in the advance group, she makes us all look bad, she does insanity( im doing my inappropriate hand motion right now). Nicole you stay with my group, i like trying to beat you, you are my motivator. lol. until the next time take care of yourselves and each other, and remember to tip your servers, have your pets spayed and nuetered, and Keep it classy San Diego.
I REALLY SHOULD HAVE USED SPELL CHECK, IT LOOKS LIKE RED ROBIN ON THE SCREEN.
It has been a great weekend i must say. It was hot and sunny, getting ready for a wonderful and beautiful summer. On saturday we had a free versus saturday mornign workout. There were about 75 people there ready to work out. As steve says they could have been on the couch but they decided you work out instead. I had the pleasure of three important guest, Lucy, Alicia, and my Mother. My mama gave up during the warm up..but alicia and lucy pushed through the whole workout. i was very proud of them. Our workout consisted of the following.
WARM UP
400 METER RUN
HIGH KNEES
JUMPING JACKS
SQUATS
BUTT KICKERS
HIGH KICKS
The work was a Tabata. Tabata is 20 seconds of hard work then 10 seconds of rest for about 4 min. There were 5 stations. Squats, Sucicides, Push-ups, Planks, and Burpees. It was a pretty rough work out but i loved every minute of it. Working out in the sun, and in the grass reminds me of my old football days. As my mother loves to tell the story, she claims i was always picking flowers instead of playing the game. I remember those saturday mornings, the only thing i wanted was the after game snacks. For some reason oranges cut into section in zip lock bags taste amazing, and this is where my love started with HI-C fruit punch with those little orange juice boxes, and who can forget a good rice crispy treat. The was my goal at the end of each game was to make it to the snack line. This workout amazed me. Im sure the fact that my mother was on the sidelines helped, it brought back many memories. For boys you always want to make your mother happy, even if that means doing something you hate doing. You do it because it makes her happy. As i was doing push-ups i could see her in the distance in her pink tshirt and Women of faith Hat..lol. It was a very calming experience, the only thing that changed is i was doing this for myself and not her. The last three months my life has been changed, little by little and I know she is proud of me. She also knows that im the dramatic child, i always have been. My older brother doesnt speak very much, and my little sister is so hood i cant understand anything she nor her friends are saying, So ive always been the talker. Im techinally not a middle child, but i am. I had two older brothers who passed away so that left me the middle child. Ive always tried to use it, and my mama never stands for it lol. I was extremely happy she was there. Lucy you are amazing, im so happy to have you on board with versus get ready to change your life. lucy emailed me about the saturday morning workout. She told me she really wanted to come to test it out. She did and she put forth some great effort and made it all the way through. She now is apart of our 6am boot camp class. Alicia and I have know each other for some time now, and we have battled this thing called weight loss together. she and i were part of WDAM's the biggest loser, i lost, she came in second. So we are very familiar with the stresses that are involved in weight loss and i know that it is not easy. Alicia being the amazing woman she is gets out of her car FULL MAKE UP. no kidding. I started laughing thinking to my self, well all thats about to be in the grass. I could tell she was nervous. I was happy she was there. She made it through all the workouts but the burpees. At the end she told me, ' i could either sit there and pass out or throw up, and i dont want to throw up in front of all these people." But she pushed through. Burpees suck man, they suck so bad. Burpees give you the same feeling like when you are on the toilet taking a dump and there is no toilet paper on the roll, so you reach underneath the cabinet and there is none, thats the feeling burpees give you. I hate burpees. As we crawled to the burpee station, i told the coach my mama said i didnt have to do burpees. She just laughed and said Lets go, its burpee time, like some annoying cheerleader. I made it through, i was soaked in sweat, dirt, grass, and im sure some ants had a heart attack. It was probably one of the best workouts ever. Nicole and Krista were there too. I need krista to start working out in the advance group, she makes us all look bad, she does insanity( im doing my inappropriate hand motion right now). Nicole you stay with my group, i like trying to beat you, you are my motivator. lol. until the next time take care of yourselves and each other, and remember to tip your servers, have your pets spayed and nuetered, and Keep it classy San Diego.
I REALLY SHOULD HAVE USED SPELL CHECK, IT LOOKS LIKE RED ROBIN ON THE SCREEN.
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
Pure Imagination
Good Morning,
It was an awesome first week of boot-camp. I must admit i am really happy to have many friends doing the boot camp with me. It makes me more competitive than i already am. This morning our workout consisted of the following. When we come in, in the morning there is a white board that Nathan writes on, the first set is normally our warm up, the middle is our stretching and the third the actual workout. This is what is normally looks like
WARM UP
10 AIR SQUATS
10 PUSH-UPS
10 SIT-UPS
400 METER RUN
FLUTTER KICKS(i call them dixie darling kicks) ..TO NATHAN..THEN JOG IT OUT UNTIL THE END
HIGH KNEES TO NATHAN ..THEN JOG IT OUT UNTIL THE END
PRISONER SQUATS TO NATHAN THEN JOG IT OUT UNTIL THE END
TWISTER KICK THINGS...TO NATHAN THEN JOG IT OUT UNTIL THE END
STRETCHING
MOUNTAIN CLIMBER
PEACOCK STRETCHING ( I DONT KNOW WHAT WE CALL IT)
STAND UP STRETCHING
QUAD STRETCHING
PLANK SERIES
FRONT 45 SEC
LEFT 30 SEC
RIGHT 30 SEC
FRONT 1 MIN
WORK OUT OF THE DAY (WOD)
200 METER RUN
20 LUNGES
20 PUSH-UPS
20 SIT-UPS
20 KETTLE BELL SWINGS
THE WOD IS DONE TIMES 3
Im going to try harder and make sure to list the workouts better so yall can understand what pain we go through. This mornings workout was a team work out. As you all know i hate to lose. Even-though my team was last we all are winners (que the violin music, roll credits). My team mates this morning were B. Harmon and Nicole. Nicole was our leader, i know right! Whoever came back first from the 200 meter run was the leader, the little Mexican beat me so she was the leader. I was very proud of her, she did an amazing job and got her stuff done. I'm also very proud of B. Harmon. Many people cant understand B. Harmon because she is a different kind of person. we often say we are alike in many ways and we are. One thing we cant stand is to let someone else have control over us. Its probably one of the hardest things for me to do is let someone else control what im doing. This morning she was tested and passed the test with flying colors. She claims she could not do kettle bell swings, but that bitch did them. She started to get pink in the face, which was my que to step in. I saw her getting angry, and she was 10 seconds away from getting in her car and driving off. The thing about versus is we don't allow any negative talking and the word CANT is never used. She kept saying i cant, and i knew if she kept saying it everybody was going to have to do 10 burpees and we probably would have killed her in the end. She pushed through with encouragement from Nathan and she did them 30 in total. Brittany im so proud of you. Often times in life we let things conquer us, and they are not supposed to. I almost cried watching her do them because it brought back painful memories from childhood, and i saw little Matthew in her eyes.She was imagining one of the kettle bells swinging over and hitting her. Im sure she never imagined that she could do it, but ole girl did, i cant say it enough how proud i am of her. My whole life i let food conquer me and control me, it had such a heavy grasp on my life. Now i know how to conquer it. Im at a point where im so encouraged and so pumped about this working out thing. I have this black blazer hanging on the wall to remind me that all things are possible. I will get into this blazer and i will be wearing it at Melissa's wedding. Ill probably pass out from the heat since its on the beach, but ill have it on with pride. You are in control of your life, what ever you want to do you can do it. When you are in a world of pure imagination the possibilities are endless. Often times i look at mens magazines and i see all these skinny men in these nice clothes that i want to be wearing. i sit back and i imagine myself in them, and that pushes me forward every morning. I have never been able to walk into a store and just pick out clothes, i always had to go allllllll the way to the back. in the back is the big and tall section, or husky..lol. My goal is to walk into a store and pick out a 2x shirt and be able to wear it. I know it will happen, it gonna be next week, but i can already imagine it.
It was an awesome first week of boot-camp. I must admit i am really happy to have many friends doing the boot camp with me. It makes me more competitive than i already am. This morning our workout consisted of the following. When we come in, in the morning there is a white board that Nathan writes on, the first set is normally our warm up, the middle is our stretching and the third the actual workout. This is what is normally looks like
WARM UP
10 AIR SQUATS
10 PUSH-UPS
10 SIT-UPS
400 METER RUN
FLUTTER KICKS(i call them dixie darling kicks) ..TO NATHAN..THEN JOG IT OUT UNTIL THE END
HIGH KNEES TO NATHAN ..THEN JOG IT OUT UNTIL THE END
PRISONER SQUATS TO NATHAN THEN JOG IT OUT UNTIL THE END
TWISTER KICK THINGS...TO NATHAN THEN JOG IT OUT UNTIL THE END
STRETCHING
MOUNTAIN CLIMBER
PEACOCK STRETCHING ( I DONT KNOW WHAT WE CALL IT)
STAND UP STRETCHING
QUAD STRETCHING
PLANK SERIES
FRONT 45 SEC
LEFT 30 SEC
RIGHT 30 SEC
FRONT 1 MIN
WORK OUT OF THE DAY (WOD)
200 METER RUN
20 LUNGES
20 PUSH-UPS
20 SIT-UPS
20 KETTLE BELL SWINGS
THE WOD IS DONE TIMES 3
Im going to try harder and make sure to list the workouts better so yall can understand what pain we go through. This mornings workout was a team work out. As you all know i hate to lose. Even-though my team was last we all are winners (que the violin music, roll credits). My team mates this morning were B. Harmon and Nicole. Nicole was our leader, i know right! Whoever came back first from the 200 meter run was the leader, the little Mexican beat me so she was the leader. I was very proud of her, she did an amazing job and got her stuff done. I'm also very proud of B. Harmon. Many people cant understand B. Harmon because she is a different kind of person. we often say we are alike in many ways and we are. One thing we cant stand is to let someone else have control over us. Its probably one of the hardest things for me to do is let someone else control what im doing. This morning she was tested and passed the test with flying colors. She claims she could not do kettle bell swings, but that bitch did them. She started to get pink in the face, which was my que to step in. I saw her getting angry, and she was 10 seconds away from getting in her car and driving off. The thing about versus is we don't allow any negative talking and the word CANT is never used. She kept saying i cant, and i knew if she kept saying it everybody was going to have to do 10 burpees and we probably would have killed her in the end. She pushed through with encouragement from Nathan and she did them 30 in total. Brittany im so proud of you. Often times in life we let things conquer us, and they are not supposed to. I almost cried watching her do them because it brought back painful memories from childhood, and i saw little Matthew in her eyes.She was imagining one of the kettle bells swinging over and hitting her. Im sure she never imagined that she could do it, but ole girl did, i cant say it enough how proud i am of her. My whole life i let food conquer me and control me, it had such a heavy grasp on my life. Now i know how to conquer it. Im at a point where im so encouraged and so pumped about this working out thing. I have this black blazer hanging on the wall to remind me that all things are possible. I will get into this blazer and i will be wearing it at Melissa's wedding. Ill probably pass out from the heat since its on the beach, but ill have it on with pride. You are in control of your life, what ever you want to do you can do it. When you are in a world of pure imagination the possibilities are endless. Often times i look at mens magazines and i see all these skinny men in these nice clothes that i want to be wearing. i sit back and i imagine myself in them, and that pushes me forward every morning. I have never been able to walk into a store and just pick out clothes, i always had to go allllllll the way to the back. in the back is the big and tall section, or husky..lol. My goal is to walk into a store and pick out a 2x shirt and be able to wear it. I know it will happen, it gonna be next week, but i can already imagine it.
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
I don't have a catchy Title Today.
Good Morning,
It feels great to be back at versus. I must admit that i did not want to go back, because i just did not feel like doing all that crap again. I enjoyed my two weeks off but quickly started to feel sluggish. I didnt feel skinny. How can a 377.6llb man feel skinny? Well I did, and now im back on track. This mornings workout was just a test to see what we could do. We did a 400 meter run, 40 squats, 30 situps, 20 push-ups, and 10 kick backs for 12 min. I only made it one round. But so did everybody else, except for Travis, and the Benz crew. Ill explain. In the boot camp there is a whole new set of people, i miss the OGM's. Hopefully they will return! So my new boot campers are Travis, the guy who owns smoothie king, and has this weird obsession with Toyota. I've known him for close to 10 years. I used to work at Domino's Pizza, and smoothie king was across the parking lot and he would always come in and buy diet cokes. This is how i met Steve too when he was working there, and all the ladies at domino's loved to watch him get out of his truck. Then we have the Benz girls. They are college aged, i didn't take the time to learn their names because i was missing the OGM's. I call them benz girls cause they drove off in a Benz, and when they passed me i was like .."These bitches!" And last but not least we have the cigegarate (spell check wont spell it for me), vodka, gravy cheese fries cocktails, and servers from Crescent City. I must admit when they first told me they were doing the boot camp, i was not happy. As we all know im a territorial person and i felt like they were trying to come into my territory. But who the hell am i, to get upset because someone wants to change their life. I quickly changed my attitude, it took a couple of days, but im so excited to have them along on the journey. Sara, Brittany, Amy and Nicole. I work with these ladies everyday, so it was nice to see them working out. I will say that it was CCG who was behind on the work out. As we were doing our kick backs, we all had this look on our face like Fuck this! But im really happy to have them, its going to be very competitive. Im sure me and Brittany will have some issues because we are just a like in some ways. Hopefully if she is gonna have any anxiety attacks she will give me a wink so i can start one and we can just leave the gym and go to Sams. I just love Sam's. Sara and Amy are gonna go to the tanning bed so we don't have to were sun shades at 6 am in the morning . Im pretty sure by the end of week there I will have either killed Nicole, or she will have killed me, or we will end up at Velveeta factory and just say screw it. This is gonna be a fun bootcamp. Im happy to see people changing and growing. I wanna thank my friend Sensation for being so encouraging. She always has some uplifting thing to say to me, and it really helps. I am prepared for the next chapter of bootcamp. Ive got loads of brocolli waiting to be boiled, and grapefruit by the pound. My only issue is drinking. I love diet soda now but its not good for you. Water is so boring though..uhhh. If it only have flavor. But crystal light does have some new flavors so every week will be a new adventure. I will be also going to the farmers market on Thursday so i can make some veggie soup. I know the next 8 weeks will be rough, but i have many goals in mind, and it is an awesome feeling when you see results. Im just pumped and ready to do this. lets knock this shit out!
It feels great to be back at versus. I must admit that i did not want to go back, because i just did not feel like doing all that crap again. I enjoyed my two weeks off but quickly started to feel sluggish. I didnt feel skinny. How can a 377.6llb man feel skinny? Well I did, and now im back on track. This mornings workout was just a test to see what we could do. We did a 400 meter run, 40 squats, 30 situps, 20 push-ups, and 10 kick backs for 12 min. I only made it one round. But so did everybody else, except for Travis, and the Benz crew. Ill explain. In the boot camp there is a whole new set of people, i miss the OGM's. Hopefully they will return! So my new boot campers are Travis, the guy who owns smoothie king, and has this weird obsession with Toyota. I've known him for close to 10 years. I used to work at Domino's Pizza, and smoothie king was across the parking lot and he would always come in and buy diet cokes. This is how i met Steve too when he was working there, and all the ladies at domino's loved to watch him get out of his truck. Then we have the Benz girls. They are college aged, i didn't take the time to learn their names because i was missing the OGM's. I call them benz girls cause they drove off in a Benz, and when they passed me i was like .."These bitches!" And last but not least we have the cigegarate (spell check wont spell it for me), vodka, gravy cheese fries cocktails, and servers from Crescent City. I must admit when they first told me they were doing the boot camp, i was not happy. As we all know im a territorial person and i felt like they were trying to come into my territory. But who the hell am i, to get upset because someone wants to change their life. I quickly changed my attitude, it took a couple of days, but im so excited to have them along on the journey. Sara, Brittany, Amy and Nicole. I work with these ladies everyday, so it was nice to see them working out. I will say that it was CCG who was behind on the work out. As we were doing our kick backs, we all had this look on our face like Fuck this! But im really happy to have them, its going to be very competitive. Im sure me and Brittany will have some issues because we are just a like in some ways. Hopefully if she is gonna have any anxiety attacks she will give me a wink so i can start one and we can just leave the gym and go to Sams. I just love Sam's. Sara and Amy are gonna go to the tanning bed so we don't have to were sun shades at 6 am in the morning . Im pretty sure by the end of week there I will have either killed Nicole, or she will have killed me, or we will end up at Velveeta factory and just say screw it. This is gonna be a fun bootcamp. Im happy to see people changing and growing. I wanna thank my friend Sensation for being so encouraging. She always has some uplifting thing to say to me, and it really helps. I am prepared for the next chapter of bootcamp. Ive got loads of brocolli waiting to be boiled, and grapefruit by the pound. My only issue is drinking. I love diet soda now but its not good for you. Water is so boring though..uhhh. If it only have flavor. But crystal light does have some new flavors so every week will be a new adventure. I will be also going to the farmers market on Thursday so i can make some veggie soup. I know the next 8 weeks will be rough, but i have many goals in mind, and it is an awesome feeling when you see results. Im just pumped and ready to do this. lets knock this shit out!
Monday, March 12, 2012
Who Tells you the Truth?
Good Morning,
Its been a long time, i shouldn't have left you, without a dope beat to step to..step to..step..to..LOL. IM BACK BABY! It has been a while since i have blogged. The boot camp at Versus ended about a week ago. I had a total weight loss of 27.4 pounds. I have never felt this way in my life it is an awesome feeling to sit here and feel healthy and looking so darn good. All of the compliments, and encouragement keep me going. On our last workout, i remember driving to the gym with this feeling of calmness. I knew that this was going to be the last time i had to do a burpee! On the last workout the OGMS, and myself gave it our all. We left that building feeling accomplished and ready to conquer the world. In life sometimes there are some things we just dont wanna do, its not that we cant do them, we just dont want to. Ive come to the conclusion that i just dont want to workout anymore..I just dont wanna do it. BUT, i know i have to. I tried to come up with my own workout plan of what i wanted to do. I aint done shit. I went swimming one time, and then my swim coach never showed up at the pool again. LOL. I have thought this over and over again. I hate walking into versus because i know whats going to happen, i hate it with a passion. When i leave on the other hand i feel amazing and so much better. I wanted to start a new chapter in my life, and i think i am. That new chapter is continuing to challenge myself, and to push forward. With that being said ill be returning to Versus next week, for the boot camp. I hate to admit when im worng, or having to go back on my words. Many people in my life told me i would return, and in the words of our beloved Whitney i said " Oh Hell no". I have two goals in mind. The first Im running that mile, my knee wouldn;t let me do it last time, but i could care less about that knee, im running that mile. My second goal is 350 llbs. Right now i have to weigh myself on a digital scale, i feel like a truck being weighed at a weigh station on the highway. I want to be able to get on the scale at the gym, the ones the doctors used when i was little. My friend Melissa is getting married in 8 weeks too, so i will have the chance to lose some weight before her wedding and enjoy a beach weekend. Im ready to do this all over again, its nice be back on a schedule. I do think with my diet im going to try to incorporate some new lunch ideas, and things to eat for dinner. Im going to weigh on Friday mornings, and my new cheat day will be Sunday. So if you see me eating on Sunday im gonna eat whatever i want to, so dont be tripping. It seems like i have it all figured out we will see what happens. Oprah always asks the one question to everyone she interviews. Her question is always " Who tells you the Truth?" Its hard to find people who will actually tell you the truth. People are afraid of the truth it scares them. Peoples feeling get hurt when they hear the truth. No matter how big and bad you are when you hear the truth, it hurts. I have heard the truth. My mom always tells me the truth, never holds back, she may slowly walk into it, and guide you to it, but she is going to tell me the truth. I had a conversation with her on the last day of boot camp. I called her and i said " Mama guess how much weight i lost?" She started to calculate, and i can just picture her sitting in her breakfast nook, using her fingers, and looking towards the sky in the way she does. Her guess was wrong but she said the most powerful words to me. she said " Well i need to see you before you start eating again" that was her way of telling me the truth LOL. she cracks me up. When i was little i would always get into trouble, i got into more trouble because i was a horrible liar, still am, LOL. But she could see right through me, she said when i would lie, i would always tilt my head as if i was thinking, are they believing this. lol. I have heard the truth from so many people, and i want to thank them. Im ready to start this journey back again. My suggestion is that you surround yourself with people who will tell you the truth. You will find those people with this simple action. If you ask them a question, and their answer makes you silent for a split second, thats the truth.
Its been a long time, i shouldn't have left you, without a dope beat to step to..step to..step..to..LOL. IM BACK BABY! It has been a while since i have blogged. The boot camp at Versus ended about a week ago. I had a total weight loss of 27.4 pounds. I have never felt this way in my life it is an awesome feeling to sit here and feel healthy and looking so darn good. All of the compliments, and encouragement keep me going. On our last workout, i remember driving to the gym with this feeling of calmness. I knew that this was going to be the last time i had to do a burpee! On the last workout the OGMS, and myself gave it our all. We left that building feeling accomplished and ready to conquer the world. In life sometimes there are some things we just dont wanna do, its not that we cant do them, we just dont want to. Ive come to the conclusion that i just dont want to workout anymore..I just dont wanna do it. BUT, i know i have to. I tried to come up with my own workout plan of what i wanted to do. I aint done shit. I went swimming one time, and then my swim coach never showed up at the pool again. LOL. I have thought this over and over again. I hate walking into versus because i know whats going to happen, i hate it with a passion. When i leave on the other hand i feel amazing and so much better. I wanted to start a new chapter in my life, and i think i am. That new chapter is continuing to challenge myself, and to push forward. With that being said ill be returning to Versus next week, for the boot camp. I hate to admit when im worng, or having to go back on my words. Many people in my life told me i would return, and in the words of our beloved Whitney i said " Oh Hell no". I have two goals in mind. The first Im running that mile, my knee wouldn;t let me do it last time, but i could care less about that knee, im running that mile. My second goal is 350 llbs. Right now i have to weigh myself on a digital scale, i feel like a truck being weighed at a weigh station on the highway. I want to be able to get on the scale at the gym, the ones the doctors used when i was little. My friend Melissa is getting married in 8 weeks too, so i will have the chance to lose some weight before her wedding and enjoy a beach weekend. Im ready to do this all over again, its nice be back on a schedule. I do think with my diet im going to try to incorporate some new lunch ideas, and things to eat for dinner. Im going to weigh on Friday mornings, and my new cheat day will be Sunday. So if you see me eating on Sunday im gonna eat whatever i want to, so dont be tripping. It seems like i have it all figured out we will see what happens. Oprah always asks the one question to everyone she interviews. Her question is always " Who tells you the Truth?" Its hard to find people who will actually tell you the truth. People are afraid of the truth it scares them. Peoples feeling get hurt when they hear the truth. No matter how big and bad you are when you hear the truth, it hurts. I have heard the truth. My mom always tells me the truth, never holds back, she may slowly walk into it, and guide you to it, but she is going to tell me the truth. I had a conversation with her on the last day of boot camp. I called her and i said " Mama guess how much weight i lost?" She started to calculate, and i can just picture her sitting in her breakfast nook, using her fingers, and looking towards the sky in the way she does. Her guess was wrong but she said the most powerful words to me. she said " Well i need to see you before you start eating again" that was her way of telling me the truth LOL. she cracks me up. When i was little i would always get into trouble, i got into more trouble because i was a horrible liar, still am, LOL. But she could see right through me, she said when i would lie, i would always tilt my head as if i was thinking, are they believing this. lol. I have heard the truth from so many people, and i want to thank them. Im ready to start this journey back again. My suggestion is that you surround yourself with people who will tell you the truth. You will find those people with this simple action. If you ask them a question, and their answer makes you silent for a split second, thats the truth.
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
The Next Chapter
Good Morning,
I know, i know, i have not blogged in about 2 weeks. In the last two weeks I've been going through a roller coaster of emotions. I've been up, I've been down, Whitney is dead, Mardi Gras was a blast, I almost went to prison..lol...all sorts of things happened. it was on that roller coaster that i learned so much about myself. in this weight lost journey that i am on, i figured out how much you actually go through. its not like you have issues with other people, its more about dealing with yourself. In the last 8 weeks, i got to know myself. i got to know myself because, i was put in an uncomfortable situation and forced to deal with it. i have learned that if you really want to do something, you can. in order for you to accomplish what you want to do, you have to make the decision yourself. Other people will always try to influence you, but until you have a come to Jesus meeting with your self it wont happen. For years my sweet, dear, hilarious mother tried to help me lose weight. On some Sundays, when i was little we would go to Lubys for Sunday lunch. I could care less about the Sunday school lesson, or about what the preacher was talking about, my focus was on lunch. I loved going to Luby's because it was cafeteria style, you had all this food to choose from. My favorite meal was mac and cheese, a salad with cups of ranch, and these little square fried fish. My mother had a rule though, I could only go back once, and i could only get one thing. I was a little fat kid. The whole time i was eating i was deciding what item i was going to get, it always ended up being the square fried fish. My mother was trying to prevent me from becoming the size i am now. She wanted me to be healthy and happy. Years later i was that scary size, and it was an uncomfortable size. When you get on a scale and you look at the number and its 404 pounds, it blows you away. A baby elephant weighs 200 pounds, i was two baby elephants. think about that yall, two baby elephants. i remember nights laying in my bed, just wanting to die. I was financially unstable, i was so big that i had to pre-tie my own shoes, i never felt loved only used to those Chub chasers ( heyyyyyy), and i really wanted to just end it. But i chose to live. I chose to love, i chose to laugh, and live life. I made a decision not for anybody else but for myself. It an awesome feeling to know that you are in charge of your life. My idol and hero Lady O..Oprah that is once said.." You are responsible for the energy you bring towards people" There is positive energy and negative energy. I had to understand that most of the energy i was bringing was so negative not by choice, but because i was living a negative lifestyle. What positive can come out of a 400 pound man, in his bed, in his underwear, eating left over ribblets, drinking a 2 liter Pepsi. NOTHING. All it took was one picture, one outside view into my world for me to say this is it. Im gonna post that picture so yall can see. In the last 8 weeks i have grown into a person that i never thought i would be. Instead of thinking about food, i think about running. Instead of trying to see how many wings i can eat, i push myself to do more burpees( burpees still can go to hell, i hate them). Its been a major change, all the clothes in my closet fit, Ill still be wearing my red tech vest its so comfortable. My shoes fit better, i don't get bed cramps in the middle of the night. I no longer get scared when watching tv in my room because i hear a wheezing noise, and think its a bug or something, when only to find out its me breathing. LOL. It has been a total lifestyle change, and its an awesome feeling. Im going to be honest I still get the feeling for nasty food and i will definitely eat it, but i know what the punishment is and what i have to do after i eat it. Seriously y'all a total change and i love it. Again with Oprah, i know, Lady O says you have to go on to the next chapter in your life. Some people stay in the same chapter and never grow, never learn, and never expound. I want to learn and grow. With that being said my next chapter will not be with Versus. I have enjoyed every minute, especially when Nathan would demonstrate a squat. I have enjoyed spending my growing times withe the OGM's who are just plain awesome. They have kids, church, husbands, bills and that the other stuff that comes with life, but they still put forth great effort, and inspire me every workout. I have to thank Nathan, he is a great trainer, positive, encouraging, and willing to work with you. He is a silent man, you should always fear a silent man, they have powers beyond our reach. He is responsible for the success i have had because he believed in me and showed me the extra concern and time. I want to thank Mike and Steve for letting me come to their gym and try to take over. I still have control issues. Mike thank you for always encouraging me, in your own, awkward way LOL..thanks Homie! Steve its strange beacuse i have known you for a long time, you helped me get through the WDAM Biggest Loser when you worked at smoothie king. You would always tell me to come out to this gym, where there was no air, and none of that fancy stuff, and i never would. I wish i had come 4 years ago, how different my life would be now. For all of my followers thank you for you time, concern, encouragement, words of wisdom, and little tips. I thank all of you for reading every week, you all have made me feel like a superstar. i remember being at work serving people and they would be like " are you Matt?" i would say yes, they would say " I just love reading your blog" i really felt famous, thank yall for that. When i win an oscar or grammy ill be sure to thank you. Thank you to my wonderful family, My mom, she stopped reading the blogs because i cursed too much, My Dad for being encouraging and never trying to give me advice..lol. My little sister for sending me a t-shirt that i soon will be able to wear, and for the "Shout Out" as the young people say. My brother for being just awesome, he has always been my protector and best friend. I want to thank all of my friends. I love each and every one of you. From Bayside high, to the OGG's, to my sweet angels. But most of all id like to thank the Lord. Thank you for giving me the strengh, courage, and wisdom to push forward in this journey. I know that i may not live a right as you would like, but you are always there, and i thank you. One of my favorite scriptures that i love to read, and i try to gain a better understanding of is. Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. (Philippians 4:6)
My next chapter will be swimming, running, and weight lifting. Beach season is coming up and i really want to have my shirt off at the beach this year. hopefully i wont scare any small children. Thank you for being on this journey with me, and as i venture into the next chapter i hope you will stay and discover what happens. ( I sound like a PBS commercial)
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
I Didn't Know my own Strength
Good Morning,
I was a little tired yesterday to write the blog after the work-out. Valentines day really sucked. I hate being alone, but i love it at the same time. I didnt have to buy any gifts, or candy and I got to spend time alone with myself watching TV. Im so cool! Yesterday's workout was pretty amazing. Its funny that now i kind of get excited going to work out. When you see results, you get extremely encouraged, and all this energy just wraps its self around you, and you feel confident. Our warm-up was a little dull in my opinion, i think its because im getting used to doing it. Our workout was an intense one to say the least. We started out on the bikes, i of course picked out the Jane Fonda bike, Barbara and Karen got the good ones, and Nettelton got the one that didn't work all that well. When we got on the bikes i was thinking that this was going to be easy and over soon. NOT. We had to sprint on the bike for 20 seconds and rest for ten, we did 8 rounds of this. when we got done we all felt like toddlers trying to walk for the first time, gummy legs, and you couldn't understand anything we were saying because we were breathing so hard. Luckily i didn't poop my pants. Riding that damn bike aint no joke. Our morning workout consisted of Burpee-pushups, Kettle bell squats, and sit ups. We had to do 7 of each AMRP for 12 min. Flossy was feeling fine, but you know how she can act up, so instead of the push up burpees i had to ride Jane( thats what he said...da dun chee)! My relationship with Jane is growing. It was a great workout. When i get up in the morning i dread driving to versus, but when i leave i feel like a Million Dollar Bill. I also like going to walmart after to buy veggies and fruits. I walkin with my sweat staind work-out clothes and my cut off gloves, saying to myself " look at all these fat asses in here" You would think I have lost 200 pounds, ive only lost 21 officially, but i feel skinny. It is an amazing feeling to see your body transform daily. Soon enough i wont have to look in the mirror to see my whoo-haa. ( sorry mama). Last year i bought this amazing grey shirt for the Mardi Gras. When i came home i couldnt even button the shirt, so i just hung it up in closet. When i started the lifesyle change, i said that this Mardi Gras i will have that shirt on. As we all are aware the number one diva Ms. Whitney Elizabeth Houston has passed away. She was my favorite singer and entertainer. There will never be a voice like hers again. On her last album there is a song called " I didnt know my own strength". In the song she talks about how survived her darkest hour, she wasn't built to break, she crashed down, she tumbled, but she didn't crumble, she got through all the pain. The grey shirt was a symbol of everything i had let happen to myself. It represented all the bad habbits, the heartache, the tears, the jokes, the name calling, the looks and the stares. As i walked passed this shirt it let me know i had let something conquer and command my life. Just like whitney i was addicted to food. it was constantly on my mind, all day everyday. even as a child while other children were playing i was inside watching Justin Wilson learning how to cook gumbo and fry fish. Which i have to say i make the best gumbo, and ill blow your head off if you think its not the best. I have had this addiction for 20 something years, and it has controlled me. i was playing, I didnt know my own strength, when i walked pass the shirt hanging in the hallway. I got a hammer and took it off the wall, i went into the bathroom and started buttoning it from the top, and after each button another tear fell, and at the end a smile. I had conquered the beast. I was no longer under this addiction. seriously, i didn't know i had all this strength, built inside of me. Often times life makes us feel like David, and its Goliath. It throws all this stuff at us, stands tall and intimidating. If we take the time to look inside our hearts, minds, and souls we can find that beast and conquer it. Find your strength, i found mine!
I was a little tired yesterday to write the blog after the work-out. Valentines day really sucked. I hate being alone, but i love it at the same time. I didnt have to buy any gifts, or candy and I got to spend time alone with myself watching TV. Im so cool! Yesterday's workout was pretty amazing. Its funny that now i kind of get excited going to work out. When you see results, you get extremely encouraged, and all this energy just wraps its self around you, and you feel confident. Our warm-up was a little dull in my opinion, i think its because im getting used to doing it. Our workout was an intense one to say the least. We started out on the bikes, i of course picked out the Jane Fonda bike, Barbara and Karen got the good ones, and Nettelton got the one that didn't work all that well. When we got on the bikes i was thinking that this was going to be easy and over soon. NOT. We had to sprint on the bike for 20 seconds and rest for ten, we did 8 rounds of this. when we got done we all felt like toddlers trying to walk for the first time, gummy legs, and you couldn't understand anything we were saying because we were breathing so hard. Luckily i didn't poop my pants. Riding that damn bike aint no joke. Our morning workout consisted of Burpee-pushups, Kettle bell squats, and sit ups. We had to do 7 of each AMRP for 12 min. Flossy was feeling fine, but you know how she can act up, so instead of the push up burpees i had to ride Jane( thats what he said...da dun chee)! My relationship with Jane is growing. It was a great workout. When i get up in the morning i dread driving to versus, but when i leave i feel like a Million Dollar Bill. I also like going to walmart after to buy veggies and fruits. I walkin with my sweat staind work-out clothes and my cut off gloves, saying to myself " look at all these fat asses in here" You would think I have lost 200 pounds, ive only lost 21 officially, but i feel skinny. It is an amazing feeling to see your body transform daily. Soon enough i wont have to look in the mirror to see my whoo-haa. ( sorry mama). Last year i bought this amazing grey shirt for the Mardi Gras. When i came home i couldnt even button the shirt, so i just hung it up in closet. When i started the lifesyle change, i said that this Mardi Gras i will have that shirt on. As we all are aware the number one diva Ms. Whitney Elizabeth Houston has passed away. She was my favorite singer and entertainer. There will never be a voice like hers again. On her last album there is a song called " I didnt know my own strength". In the song she talks about how survived her darkest hour, she wasn't built to break, she crashed down, she tumbled, but she didn't crumble, she got through all the pain. The grey shirt was a symbol of everything i had let happen to myself. It represented all the bad habbits, the heartache, the tears, the jokes, the name calling, the looks and the stares. As i walked passed this shirt it let me know i had let something conquer and command my life. Just like whitney i was addicted to food. it was constantly on my mind, all day everyday. even as a child while other children were playing i was inside watching Justin Wilson learning how to cook gumbo and fry fish. Which i have to say i make the best gumbo, and ill blow your head off if you think its not the best. I have had this addiction for 20 something years, and it has controlled me. i was playing, I didnt know my own strength, when i walked pass the shirt hanging in the hallway. I got a hammer and took it off the wall, i went into the bathroom and started buttoning it from the top, and after each button another tear fell, and at the end a smile. I had conquered the beast. I was no longer under this addiction. seriously, i didn't know i had all this strength, built inside of me. Often times life makes us feel like David, and its Goliath. It throws all this stuff at us, stands tall and intimidating. If we take the time to look inside our hearts, minds, and souls we can find that beast and conquer it. Find your strength, i found mine!
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